I have just realised the word ‘question’ incorporates the word ‘quest’ so I am reframing my thoughts around the questions I am asking myself.
I have been wondering why I have moved my art practice through so many genres in such a short time. I have been asking myself why is it that just as soon as I define what I do, I change and do something different.
Today (and possibly just for today) I wish it was different for me. I wish (today) that I could have just focused on one genre, one style, one methodology, one material even, and learnt it carefully and well over many years.
I can’t see how that could have, or would have happened for me so its not a realistic thought but today, I am enjoying dreaming of such a reality. For I imagine that that reality would have been so much easier.
As it is, I learn to climb a tree and then I drop off the branch and learn to sing a song, and then I sing the song and immediately look at how I can dance to that song, and then before I know it I am wanting to learn to make shoes for those dancing feet and just as the shoes are slipped on ….the urge is now to adorn the ankles with jewellery…. and so on.
Perhaps it was always meant to be this way. My grandmother taught me how to knit, sew and crochet whilst I built with lego (in the days when we made our own creations from a limited pallet of bricks) and my grandfather taught me how to shade and draw whilst my school teacher taught me piano and my mother gave me a banjo.
Having moved from wood turning to basketry, from monumental earth work to painting, from live art performance to film, from dance to writing, and from ceramics to sound, I am (today) exhausted.
I am delighted too of course. Delighted for the vocabulary these things provide, and yet at the same time I remain frustrated at my lack of skills and of time.
Having worked for a year on learning how to edit video I have finally managed to create some films to be shown at a gallery in May. Whilst uploading and burning DVDs etc, software updates caused a disaster day on my computer. Today I lost many significant files and video projects. I have surely become too reliant on technology now. I desperate to return to simplicity of things such as knitting needles, pencils, and paper.
I have enjoyed sharing my journey into video work with the world. Video has a clear and secure place in my art practice, thats for sure. For now though at least, it is time to take stock, reflect and return to a simplicity which allows for an original creative flow. A flow which is unhindered by the constraints of my technical limitations.